Johnathon is now a "RALLY KID"

As you may know by now I am a Rally Athlete running to raise money and awareness for Childhood Cancer Research. Johnathon is now officially a "Rally Kid" his profile and picture will be posted on the Rally website http://www.rallyfoundation.org/

Other people can also chose to run in honor of Johnathon. So again his spirit lives on.

The following is the letter I submitted to the foundation as his bio, I had a hard time getting through the last part of it as I was over come with tears and could no longer see the keyboard.

The letter is as follows:

Well when it comes to talking about Johnathon it isn't hard. He was the light of my life, my sweet little angle. He was really sent into my life to change the direction I was headed. And although his time here was short, he touched so many people and changed lives as well.

He was a beautiful baby boy with the biggest blue eyes that would just melt your heart! He had such a great laugh and a personality that just shined! He spread so much warmth and love to everyone he touched. He was my special "little man".

Johnathon was 17 months old the day I found out that he had been diagnosed with Neuroblastoma stage 4. That was the day that I will never forget!

"your son has cancer!!"

Cancer!? Kids don't get cancer!! And as the days, and weeks and months of in and out of the hospital I had the rough awakening that children really do get cancer.

Neuroblastoma is a rare and aggressive cancer that at the time we were limited treatment options, most of the options that we were given were "trial and research" options.


But as a mother what do you do? You chose to fight! And we fought hard. Johnathon fought his cancer for 6 months, he had surgeries to remove the tumors, chemotherapy, radiation and stem cell rescue. He spent 2 months in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit and fought to get home, even when the prognosis was poor. We walked out of that PICU with the entire staff clapping.

After a short time of being cancer free the cancer returned and this time it was everywhere. In December 1998 the surgeons told us the tumors were inoperable, and sadly told me this would be his last Christmas, I took him home.

I opted to stop treatments. I could no longer see him suffer no longer risk losing him in the hospital hooked to machines, drugged and surrounded by strangers. I chose to let him spend his last few weeks surrounded by family his stuffed animals his pet dog and me. We sat around and watched his favorite movies and I never left his side.

Johnathon became weaker and sicker very quickly, he was dying, he had waited until I had made it back to my mothers house where he knew I would be safe. I held him close and told him " mommy is going to be okay, you will always be my little angel, It is okay to go, the angels are waiting for you, I love you Johnathon, I love you." And as he drew his last breath in he looked at me and touched my face and said "love you mama, love you" Just as he came into the world it was my face he saw and as he left this world it was my face he saw. Johnathon passed away quietly in my arms on 16 January 1999, he was 2 1/2 years old.